


Escape From IKEA

by vaporrub



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Domestic Boyfriends, Humor, IKEA, M/M, Road Head, Rough Oral Sex, Shopping Trip, Wordcount: 100-1.000
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-11
Updated: 2020-06-11
Packaged: 2021-03-03 22:21:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 865
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24623122
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vaporrub/pseuds/vaporrub
Summary: John and Dave are trapped in IKEA with no backup and no hope, they do their best to make it out alive.
Relationships: John Egbert/Dave Strider
Kudos: 19





	Escape From IKEA

"Can I help you?" One of the employees walked up behind Dave and John, the employee noticed how the two of them looked stressed, the shorter man was biting his nails and he looked like he was almost shaking.

"Oh! No thank you!" John was quick to answer with, "we're fine on our own."

John and Dave waited for the sale's person to leave before they started panicking again. The two of them scanning the directory map for some way out.

"We're here." John points at the dot on the map. "And the stairs are over here, but we went by the plant section and I haven't seen a **hint** of any staircase!"

"If things keep going on like this, we're just gonna have to find some elevator or some shit."

"Good plan!" John nods at his boyfriend's words.

The two of them have been lost for hours, walking back and forth. Freaking out and waving off all of the people and employees that try to help them out. Neither of them could admit defeat. Once they found themselves onto the second floor, they couldn't find the way out. The two of them have been carrying a basket of cheap towelettes and plastic utensils, they went in looking for a cheap desk chair, but now they are just trying to find someway out of this hellscape.

John came up with a plan when he over hears two women talking about having enough of something and that they are planning on checking out. John grabs Dave's arm and pulls him along with him as he whispers, "we can follow them out."

"Good idea, babe."

They traced the women's steps, but every single isle the women would stop and take a peak at what's on the shelves, it takes about ten minuets before John just tosses up his arms and admits defeat loud enough for the women to hear. "Oh come on! We're never gonna leave!"

John sighs, "maybe we should call it quits... just admit it... we're lost."

"Nah, man." Dave shakes his head. "We have an awesome sense of direction. Just this place is built like a labyrinth, designed to force people to shop like mad. They hid the exit so middle-aged women like that with money to burn get trapped by Klimt paintings with the nipples censored out."

John nods, "you're right! Let's make another plan!"

Dave instantly agrees, "we should do this thing I heard about, where we keep walking against the wall on the right until we finally find an out."

"That's so smart, honey!" John grabs onto Dave's arm. Sweetly idolizing his super smart boyfriend. "Let's try it!"

Dave traces the wall on the right side of the building. John follows behind him saying, "if this works, I'll blow you the whole way home."

"Fucking choice." Dave feels determined to make this fucking thing work.

He's getting out of here, whether IKEA likes it or not.

* * *

John groans once he sees the bed section pop up again, "we've passed by the bed section three times already!"

"Easy." Dave tries to settle John down, "we haven't passed it trying this method yet, let's just hold out."

As John and Dave walk through the building and past the isles, they get weird looks from passers-by. They'll see soon enough that this world is hell. IKEA is a no-mans land where nothing makes sense and everything is upside down. John and Dave keep walking against the wall. Hoping for freedom. Once they reach the restaurant it's the end of the road for the right wall.

"Okay." Dave turns behind him and tells John, "on to the next one."

John and Dave walk past the restaurant and over to the next wall. They walk past the freezer section and **there it is!**

John grabbed Dave close to his chest and smacked a well earned kiss to his boyfriend's lips. John pulls away and shouts, "I love you!" as he drags Dave to the giant cement staircase. Dave smiles an almost smug smile. He's gonna hold John to his offer and Dave's well aware that John's pumped enough to see it through.

* * *

Slurps and moans fill the car. Dave leans his back against the driver's seat.

Dave holds one hand onto the steering wheel and one on his boyfriend's head. He leads John's head with his hand on how to suck him _right._

Dave feels how tight and hot John's wet throat is around his entire length. Dave's on edge now. He starts thrusting his hip into John's open mouth.

John moans and lets out a yelp as Dave unleashes his loud down John's throat. Dave's cock is throbbing against John's tongue and John's doing his best to take in all of it. "Shit!" Dave keeps pumping John's head up and down his member as he milks out the rest of his cum into John's mouth. John pulls away and pants, he shows Dave his open mouth just to prove that he really did swallow all he could, a trail of droll and cum is dripping off of John's chin from his red soar lips. Dave pants,

"Babe, I... shit I really fucking love you too."


End file.
